I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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