writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
