That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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