I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
