He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Randomize
