I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
