Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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