all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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