I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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