Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
