I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
