erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize