My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
we should paint friendship bongs
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize