im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize