Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I want a musical about memes.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
