he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
