i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
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