Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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