no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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