All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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