she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Randomize
