her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
