let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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