Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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