he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize