if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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