Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
