just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
