The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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