i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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