I want to stick my p in your. b.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
