just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
