You're a womanizer and a bitch.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize