we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
