btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Randomize