Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I don't deserve a penis
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
