so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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