If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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