how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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