so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
