If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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