the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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