We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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