dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
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