Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize