I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
