party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
