Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I would ride that face into the sunset
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