do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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