Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
You need a sexual gate keeper
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Randomize
