yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
